Korie Lee-Anne's photostream

Korie Lee-Anne's photostream on Flickr.

Flicker photostream

" target="_blank">

Download Mixtape | Free Mixtapes Powered by DatPiff.com

Mommy and Sayge

Sayge Temperance LeVay

Guardian Angel

Guardian Angel, a photo by Twinzmama on Flickr.

787, a photo by Korie Lee- Anne on Flickr.

The esteBAM Show Welcomes: Korie from Rock of Love 2 02/29 by The esteBAM Show | Blog Talk Radio

Listen to internet radio with The esteBAM Show on Blog Talk Radio

Ya'll Party Nappy Roots Ft. Graciously Vain

Y'all Party

Oxycotin

Pregnancy

     

                          

My Pregnancy Story

Getting pregnant was crossed off the agenda along time ago.  As a child I very much wanted to have my own kids.  I thought it was the coolest thing to be able to have your own to play with them.  I guess I thought they were like barbie dolls.  I didn't realize that were the biggest responsibility any human could ever have.  If you think about it Obama's wouldn't even have a job if it wasn't for people repopulating.  

Things slowly were put into perspective for me.  The older I got the more responsibilities there were.  What I could push off on my mom and sister I would. I was always the baby and never had to deal with such things because there were people to always hold my hand.  So I decided babies just weren't for me.

I meet Michael when I was twenty four years old.  He was thirty eight.  It was a love hate relationship but we've surprisingly made it work for 6 years now.  Still through out most of our relationship having kids was a big NO.  Even though Michael wanted a child with me.

Im thirty now and in the last couple of years a lot has changed for me emotionally and physically.  Its almost like all women are programed at some point in their life to start desiring babies.  Well that's what was happening to me.  Even though I was feeling the baby thing we weren't trying for pregnancy. It just happened.

I was 2 months into my pregnancy before I knew.  Michael jokingly had made a few comments.  His son had made a few about my weight increase. Also I had been on Zyprexa, sleep aid, that had made me gain enormous amount of weight.  Which is what I thought the source of my problem had been.  

I went to visit my sister in georgia for two weeks and the whole time she was like "are you sure your not pregnant....Well I think you are!!"  So I decided to go and get a pregnancy test.  There were no if ands or buts about it I was pregnant.  I wanted to have an accurate answer so I went to the doctor.  My mother was in the room with me and it made me very uncomfortable.  I was waiting for her facial expression of disappointment.  The Doctor came back and before he could get the door shut he said "you are defiantly pregnant." I was sooooo happy with the biggest grin on my face.  I looked over at mom and she was smiling too.  Not the fake one the sincere one.  What a relief.  Then my doctor asked me to lay down so he could examine my belly to see about how far along I was.  Four months he told me.  

I immediately went home and called Michael to tell him the news. I told him the news. The doctor said that I was four months pregnant and he went silent......he said "how is that possible? I wasn't with you four months ago."  My heart dropped.  This was suppose to be the most exciting time of my life and Im getting accused of being unfaithful.  While balling my eyes out I told him "there has been no one else.  The doctor must be wrong then because he didn't do an actual sonogram.  We would just have to get an OBGYN to get accurate information.  Everything turned out fine.  I was on 2 months pregnant and Michaels soul was at peace.  He was able to move on to enjoy our pregnancy.

Motherhood

Motherhood

How do you mother a teenage child who doesn’t want to be mothered?  Well the source his self has taught me….you don't. 

Its an unfortunate solution when it comes to raising you own, because never in a mothers way would there not be an option. 

Raising a seventeen year old boy while 8 months pregnant with his sister is tough.  A teenager to raise alone is quite a massive challenge.  With a baby on board its fuel to the fire.  But Wait... heres another twist Im not my sons biological mom.  Not even the step mom.  I am his fathers girlfriend.

He became apart of my life at the age of twelve.  I was just twenty five.  Which in my mind might implicate a problem as to his views of me.  What I had going for me at this point was his age. His characteristics should be very excepting, and wanting so desperately to be excepted in return. And I was right. He welcomed me with open arms I think because I seemed more like a sister because of our closeness in age. We bonded immediately which build the amazing relationship between him and I, his fathers significant other. 

I became a very influential and important adult in his life. It was almost as if I was feeling a void for him. A parental void. I became the emotional support, the confidant, The one who pass no judgement an intern became the one to trust. 

Next couple of years where leading up to his adolescence.  Which I knew from my years as a teen thats when all hell breaks loose. As predicted sixteen was the year.  Now around me it seemed as if everyone was at a breaking point with him. Like it was time for them to throw in the towel. Which I could totally sympathize with them being his parents. They actually raised this child from day one. Where as I only was exposed to six years of his life.  I still had some fight in me.

So Ive dedicated the last six months with the attempt at raising a teenager. Pretty quickly you become familiar to their new traits. For example they know everything, they’re always right, they will argue every you or they say into the ground with total ineffectual information, never except that they are or could be wrong even if it has been proven for them in tangible site, they are invincible to everything, nothing is ever good enough anymore, their wants have now become their needs (as they see it), they've become masters at their life long craft Manipulating, and this is just the icing on the cake.

You begin to notice that they have become Doctors, legislatures, and even the new spokesperson of WebMD. Mine is Doctor Dre and no thats not the rapper although being a rapper is now in his repeater. He must have a seat in the senate or the house due to his over night knowledge he acquired about America and how we run it. My mother always was referred to as “The Walking Dictionary”. Well she was a scholar from Welsley College. I mean she met the credentials to own that title. My sister Wendie short lived but owned the title WenMD (WebMD). Some how she always seemed to know the answer. That is until my seizures came along. She was denounced of her title.  Just because her title was striped didn’t mean a new princess should step up and claim the title…..sure enough my teenager did.  Jokingly in reference to himself, I heard him say DreMD.  I could see now just how much he had changed. 

My teenager seems like the one on trial here but unfortunately these actions he has acquired are just the playbook for all teenagers. So I understand that this is normal but it doesn’t make it any less easier.

Hurry

Hurry up Sayge!!!!